Today I learned how not to cry at work

Which is probably a blessing all things considered.
But the night *before*...

When I leave on extended vacations, I have my friend Stephanie watch over wee Norman for me. This is a mixed blessing as #1. Norman adores her and probably cares for her company more than mine but #2. her catering to his little cat tantrums makes coming home to him an absolute nightmare. Since returning from Montreal, Norm has taken to screaming his fool kitty head off at our front door. Presumably he wants to go out in the hallway and sit two feet from the door, tense and nervous, for some reason or another until he feels ready to come back in (about an hour later). Stephanie would go out there and sit with him. I will not- especially not at 2am on a Monday morning when I have to be up at 5.

Norman has had one bath his entire feline life and the encounter was such that I haven’t since even considered repeating the experience. When he’s bad- I spray him. With a little misting bottle. This worked out to my advantage for quite some time as he’ll do anything to stay dry. But then...

Norman hid it.

I’m not kidding. I know I’m one of those people who anthropomorphize their cats but just hear me out... Ok, since I’ve ‘lost’ the bottle I’ve been keeping a glass of water on my headboard. When he goes into his rendition of CATS I run over and flick water on him. Welllllllll... last night I was hella tired. So instead I uhm...

Ok. So I threw the whole glass on him. But really- I was driven over the course of the week to that. Just saying. He deserved it. I swear. I did feel really bad though when some went up his kitty nose and he kept snorting and shaking his head as he shot me hateful glances. Feeling bad, I chased him about to try and dry him off and love on him in general to make up for it. He wasn’t having any of it and I thought it might be a good idea to reload my glass and keep it handy- just in case.

A little bit later, as I lay in bed just drifting off- I felt him jump on the bed and walk up towards me. I smiled to know I was forgiven as he walked directly into my outstretched hand for his stoke, purring all the while. He didn’t break stride from this as he stepped over me, onto the headboard. Putting one little furry foot into the glass there, he tipped it over directly on my face.

I'll admit. A part of me was proud of him.